Things To Consider When Dating As A Single Mom

When you’re out on the market again, this time with little ones at home, you’ve probably already figured out it’s not nearly as simple as it used to be. No more last-minute, impromptu coffee dates… no more late-night forays without consequences to face the next day. If you’ve ever tried to stay up til 3 a.m. and then face a toddler the next morning, then you know what I’m talking about!

To help you cope with being a single mom who’s now dating, here are some things to consider.

Telling Your Date About Your Kids

First up — tell your date about your kids or not? This is a tough one, but I tend to lean toward the “full disclosure” model.

If you’re into casual encounters, that may not be the case… but if you’re starting to date with the hopes of finding a new mate, don’t waste your time on dates who don’t like kids. Your online dating profiles don’t need to include photos of the kids.  Also, try not to have the kids be your only topic of conversation (your date wants to know you can handle adult conversations too), but find a way to bring it up pretty much right off the bat.

Telling The Kids About your date

On the flip side, when it comes to full disclosure with your kids, you don’t really need to afford your kids the same courtesy.

Older kids, meanwhile, may lean toward jealousy and resentment. That’s not necessary when you first start dating someone.

It’s up to you to decide how long to wait before you tell your kids about that special someone you’ve met. Some people have a magic number such as “three months” or “one month,” while others like to feel out each situation individually. I tend to think if you find someone you really like, you shouldn’t wait an extended period of time, because it’s good to see how the kids and your new love interest get along sooner rather than later.

Finding Time For Dates — And Maybe Even Grooming

If you’re a single mom, chances are your budget is much more limited than you’d like — and so is your free time. So how to find time to date, and even worse, when to find the time to get your hair cut, get your nails done, or perhaps even get that facial you’ve been wanting so desperately? This is an especially-tough one for parents who have very young children who are not yet in school.

Maybe you know another single parent who’s dating and needs a night off a week to spend with their special someone. Offer to trade nights with that person, so you take care of their kids one night a week in exchange for a night off yourself. That way you won’t have to worry about how you’re going to pay that babysitter yet again.

Find Away To Make It Work

If you’re really ready to get out there and start dating, you’ll need more tenacity and more creative thinking than was necessary when you were single and unencumbered. But by thinking out each step and doing the right amount of planning, you’ll be on your way to finding that new love.

About the author

Nicovee is an American writer, producer and editor who got her start in TV news, spending 5 years as a producer in a large-market station. Her writing & editing clients always come back because she’s professional, efficient and easy to work with — not to mention her work is done right the first time!

Think you’re ready to date a single mom then make sure you read this first.